Frank (Bruce Willis), Joe (Morgan Freeman), Marvin (John Malkovich) and Victoria (Helen Mirren) used to be the CIA’s top agents – but the secrets they know just made them the Agency’s top targets. Now framed for assassination, they must use all of their collective cunning, experience and teamwork to stay one step ahead of their deadly pursuers and stay alive. To stop the operation, the team embarks on an impossible, cross-country mission to break into the top-secret CIA headquarters, where they will uncover one of the biggest conspiracies and cover-ups in government history.

/Film points us to an inventory of photos and videos that have been released surrounding the 2011-slated film’s production. A man-anorexic Henry Cavill (“Tudors”) headlines the Greek mythology actioner as Theseus, while Mickey Rourke plays King Hyperion. Freida Pinto (Slumdog Millionaire) plays the female lead, Phaedra.

The early synopsis goes like this:

A purported bastard who retains an allegiance to his mother despite the fact that he longs to join the quest of a king who is battling demons in ancient Greece later embarks on a grail of discovery that has him finding he is the king’s son and also fated to become his country’s greatest hero as he leads the successful war against long-imprisoned Titans who are hoping to use the demons to restore their power.

Rogue has put out six on-set videos from the set so far, chronicling the film’s production.

Video 1

Video 2

Video 3

Video 4

Video 5

Video 6

A great deal of nostalgia will be felt for Disney’s cartoon version of Robin Hood after seeing Ridley Scott’s overblown take on it. It’s also going to make you nostalgic for the two and a half hours you wasted in the theater.

Robin Hood is the age-old story of the outlaw and his band of merry men who rob from the rich and give to the poor. An important point of clarification for Scott’s version, this is an origins story, focusing on how Robin Longstride (Russell Crowe) came to dwell in the woods with the lovely Lady Marion (Cate Blanchett) rather than what happens once he gets to the hood. It’s like finding out how Anakin became Darth Vader and, like the Star Wars back story, it’s not very good. Mired down by countless battles, gallons of spilled blood, treason, royal troubles, adultery, and general mayhem, it’s an epic story that fails, well, epically.

When first met, Robin wields an arrow for King Richard, but as soon as the king dies in battle Robin and his fellow travelers hightail it back to England to beat the rush. Through a strange twist of fate, they end up in possession of the actual crown and must ferry it back to London while traveling under the identities of slain knights. Bound by a promise made to one of the aforementioned knights, Robin travels to the man’s hometown, Nottingham, where he wins over the grieving father and widow, and with their blessing, retains the man’s identity. It’s complicated and far-fetched, and we haven’t even gotten to the repressed memories, let alone the coincidence that the dead knight’s father just happens to hold the key to Robin’s true past. That whole travesty of a plot comes much later. At this point in the film it’s just confusing tracking who is in which country, and who is allied with whom; don’t think that all the location identifiers that continually flash across the screen are going to help you either.

There’s great irony that the film was delayed because of the writers’ strike several years ago, because they might have been better off without them. The story, created by Brian Helgeland, Ethan Reiff, and Cyrus Voris, is a complete mess. And the script penned by Helgeland is filled with overly-wrought dialogue interspersed with penis and sex jokes; it’s more unbalanced than a wobbling weeble. Speeches delivered from horseback are less than inspiring, and did I mention the part about repressed childhood memories?

Despite driving a vehicle that threatens to break down every two minutes, Crowe and Blanchett rise to the challenge. Crowe certainly has enough charisma and a husky growl to imbue Robin with the animal magnetism needed to both lead men and run through the forest with a bow and arrow. But when he can’t even make the role captivating while wearing leather pants you know there’s a bigger problem at play. For her part, Blanchett is obviously giving her all to a role that doesn’t give her much to work with. Marion is unwilling to conform to society’s restraints towards women, but even so, she quickly collapses into a tired cliché that no amount of well-delivered lines can overcome.

There’s actually a strong supporting cast that manages to keep the film from completely dying on the battlefield, including William Hurt, Lost’s Kevin Durand, and the go-to evil villain these days, Mark Strong (Kick-Ass, Sherlock Holmes). But surprisingly, it’s the bevy of extras who are even more noticeable. In a film with hundreds, if not thousands, of extras as soldiers and villagers, they are horribly distracting and awkward. But rather than blame them for their clumsy fighting and domineering presence, it just demonstrates that Scott’s direction is lackluster and, dare I say it, lazy. The whole project feels like a cheap knock-off of Lord of the Rings, from nearly identical scenes, camera perspectives, and even actors. It’s neither fresh nor gritty. It’s just regurgitated material with only minimal investment in its quality or interest.

And that’s the crux of the film’s problem. Even with all the big battles, flying arrows, and spurting blood, it’s just boring. Scott forgets that a period piece needs more than men in chain mail riding horses, it needs a hero. A champion. A gladiator. Robin Hood is definitely not that person, even if he robs from the rich and gives to the poor. Although, I think the only people really getting robbed are those buying the tickets.

Since the first film, Iron Man has helped stabilize the world, bringing forth an era of peace and tranquility not seen in decades. Naturally the U.S. Army is desperate for this ”weapon” — the Iron Man suit — to promote more peace. Riiiight…

A Senate hearing sets up the conflict between Stark – resolutely defending his ownership over the technology – and Justin Hammer (Sam Rockwell), a rival defense manufacturer. (If a real Senate hearings were this exciting CSPAN would get a huge ratings boost.) Despite the incredulity of this overly scripted and melodramatic scene (even for a film filled with flying men in suits), it does allow Rockwell to introduce a truly sniveling character in Hammer.

Meanwhile, in Russia, heavily tattooed brilliant scientist Ivan Vanko (Mickey Rourke) has vowed revenge for the betrayal of his father by Stark’s father (played by Mad Men’s John Slattery as a Walt Disney-like innovator). But it takes Hammer and Vanko teaming up to become a force worthy of challenging Iron Man – and even then it’s not all that impressive.

In fact, it’s Tony himself who is the biggest threat to Iron Man’s continued existence, for the element that fuels his battery heart is slowly poisoning him; in typical Tony fashion, he’s determined to wallow in self-destructive behavior until it’s his time. Which leads the film, written by Justin Theroux, to also wallow for a while.

[To read the rest of Tim's review, hop on over to Metro Weekly, where his article is currently running.]

Like anyone with a handicap, the film tries to overcompensate and mask its shortcomings. Despite the virtual smell of a wet, bearskin rug every time Jeffrey Dean Morgan (Watchmen) comes into frame, The Losers succeeds as a pretty sexy film. Zoe Saldana rivals Angelina Jolie as the hottest chick to bear arms, while Chris Evans humors and titillates with lines like, “You liking the angle of dangle?” Pair this intrinsic flirting with largely pointless fight sequences — Saldana flexing her tribal movements learned in Avatar — and over-used explosives, and you have a pleasantly sadist film. And who doesn’t like that?

As you would imagine, the plot is forgettable. However, the ordinary betrayal/revenge story does introduce the first eco-friendly armament called the “Snook”. Yes, tree-huggers can now decimate with impunity using this egg-shaped device that emits no pollution. Secretive government mastermind, Max (Jason Patric), doesn’t care much about the environment, but he loves the destructive force of the device and wants to use it as a catalyst for bolstering domestic military defenses. The Losers, a five-man former military team, is after Max, since he framed them for killing 25 children in Bolivia. Living up the stereotype that real men never ask for directions (or they’re just really that dumb), The Losers rely on Aisha (Saldana) to guide the way to Max. That’s pretty much all you need to know.

The cast is the biggest achievement for the film. Idris Elba (“The Wire“) as Roque is the slickest mo-fo around, and puts Morgan’s lead, Clay, to shame. Evans is just as wisecracking and reckless as he was as Torch in The Fantastic Four. And is there anything not to like about Saldana wielding a rocket-launcher? Fierce isn’t the word. Jason Patrick’s character is the real loser here. His Max, often clad in an impossibly clean white suit, is far from menacing and unworthy of the dread that he supposedly instills. Max’s bum left hand and affinity for playing ‘Go Fish’ isn’t so much quite-psycho as it is idiot-poser.

The first buddy blow-’em-up of the warm season, The Losers at least gets out in front The A-Team, which bows in June. Small achievements here and there make The Losers an adequately fun film, and a decent filler before we get to see a shirtless Bradley Cooper…I mean The A-Team. During this movie lull before the typical blockbuster-filled summer, The Losers satisfies our low expectations.

Kick-Ass is flat-out, balls-to-the-wall funny. Now, if you’re someone who likes to get on a high horse about inappropriate material in movies, Kick-Ass will give you saddle sores. But if you appreciate humor that’s outrageous and makes you gasp in that I-can’t-believe-they-just-did-that way, Kick-Ass is right up your alley.

Speaking of alleys, Kick-Ass (Aaron Johnson) is just the guy you’d want to meet in a dark one. He’s a loner who wears a mask to shield his identity while protecting innocent New Yorkers from crime. He’s like Batman, only without the cool gadgets, an accommodating butler or a license. He’s really just a dorky teenager with a penchant for comic books who wears a modified scuba suit.

Based on the comic book written by Mark Millar, Kick-Ass is the assumed identity of unassuming high school loser Dave Lizewski. Fed up with being the neighborhood punching bag, Dave assumes the role of Kick-Ass, defender of dorks everywhere. Needless to say, with no powers, training or high-tech tools, he’s not that intimidating. But all it takes is one kid with a camera phone and the power of the Internet for Kick-Ass to become a household name.

Meanwhile, another hero is being groomed for legendary crime-fighting status. This one, however, has balls. Hit-Girl (Chloe Moretz) is awesome, no other way to say it. This pre-teen can eliminate a seasoned thug using a gun, a spear or a knife. A hallway lined with trained killers? No problem. A room filled with drug-dealing malcontents? Child’s play. Thanks to the tutelage of Big Daddy (Nicolas Cage), Hit-Girl is a cold-blooded assassin in a purple wig.

To read the rest of Tim’s review, hop on over to Metro Weekly, where his article is currently running.

The original Clash of the Titans, released in 1981 starring Harry Hamlin, Laurence Olivier and Maggie Smith, among others, is a hoot to watch. Between the outmoded special effects and a mechanical owl that plays a pivotal role, it’s a camp classic that doesn’t really stand the test of time. With the remake, director Louis Leterrier, responsible for Transporter 2 and The Incredible Hulk, is going for something big. Special-effects monsters, wars between man and the gods, and in 3D. It’s a Herculean task — one the director is not strong enough to pull off.

Knowledge of mythology isn’t necessary for seeing Clash of the Titans. In fact, knowledge might actually hinder one’s experience, since screenwriters Travis Beacham, Phil Hay and Matt Manfredi take great liberties with the stories. This time around, Perseus (Sam Worthington), the bastard son of Zeus (Liam Neeson), must decide whether to save mankind or take his place on Olympus with his father. When his Uncle Hades (Ralph Fiennes) makes a power grab, only the demigod Perseus can save the beautiful Andromeda (Alexa Davalos) from the dreaded Kraken.

Much of the film follows Perseus as he sets out with his band of warrior friends, and the lovely Io (Gemma Arterton), to find a way to kill the sea monster. Meanwhile, back at home, a sect gathers in an attempt to appease the gods. It’s your classic quest story filled with worship and rebellion, hubris and insolence, giant scorpions and serpent-permed gorgons.

The movie attempts to capture themes on a Goliath scale, like man vs. gods and familial obligation, but achieves all on a teeny-tiny David level. Action supercedes plot and dialogue, and frankly that’s wise, because some of the writing makes Avatar sound like Shakespeare. One can almost forgive Worthington’s stilted delivery because each word must taste like vinegar in his mouth.

To read the rest of Tim’s review, hop on over to Metro Weekly, where his article is currently running.

Michael Fassbender (300) is a standout as lead Quintus Dias, an unrelenting Roman soldier caught behind enemy lines. And Olga Kurylenko is fierce (in various definitions of the term) as the ruthless and mute Pict tracker, Etain. Centurion primarily surrounds Etain’s pursuit of Dias and his small group of surviving soldiers from the Ninth Legion as they make their way back to friendly territory; the legion was decimated during its invasion of the Pict land.

As Dias and his diminishing band of brothers is pursued over the river and through the woods, Marshall gives audiences an impressive array of sweeping landscapes that would make National Geographic jealous. The visuals buoy Centurion a bit, since Etain’s pursuit becomes pretty rote. Eventually, Dias and his remaining comrades decide to stop running and confront the plucky Picts. You can imagine how Centurion plays out.

Marshall, despite a subtle hat-tip in the beginning of the film, based Centurion on various historical details around the Ninth Legion and the Celtic tribe of the Picts. He could have leveraged this context a bit better, instead of relegating much of the film to a cat and mouse chase. Too, the Roman-centric nature of the film and the battle with barbarous natives reminds one of 2004′s King Arthur; Clive Owen played the Centurion in that film. Arthur seems like what Centurion was aiming for, but sadly missed.

The Descent made a name for Marshall, but he’s in danger of squandering that equity. Doomsday was chalked up to growing pains or experimentation, but Centurion may be the sign of things to come. I really hope not.

Matthew Vaughn’s Kick-Ass may turn out to be the most exciting film of SXSW 2010. The odd-ball take on modern-day superheroes is a supremely twisted, fun take on the genre tale that lives up to its name, despite some missteps here and there.

Aaron Johnson leads as Dave Lizewski (aka Kick-Ass), a geek turned citizen crime-fighter, whose only real power is being “invisible to girls.” The film takes potshots at the Spider-Man franchise here and there, providing a humorous context for Dave being just an everyday guy with a fancy wetsuit and pseudo-fetishist face mask. Indeed, Dave has no superpowers and swiftly collides with that bloody reality, simultaneously catching the attention of more capable purveyors of justice, Big Daddy (Nicholas Cage) and his daughter, Hit-Girl (Chloe Moretz). The trio gets entangled in a web of respective personal pursuits, which affords audiences one fantastic fight seen after another. Vaughn outdid himself with slow camera work, sophisticated choreography and a kick-…err, bad-ass soundtrack.

Various formulaic devices distract Kick-Ass from being a remarkable film both in visuals and story. But that’s not exactly what it’s going for in the first place, right? When it’s released next month, the film will certainly be the most fun you can have at the theater, hands-down. Pint-sized Chloe Moretz is the clear standout in the two hours of ass-kicking — the most vicious pre-teen you’ll ever come across who seems a cross between Hanna Montana and Wolverine. Kick-Ass is definitely worth catching when released next month.